Polyphonic

I see her often sitting out in front of Rainbow Blossom on the curb. When you walk by, she looks up and says, “Can you spare any change?” And I always say, “I don’t have any cash, I’m sorry.”

Today was no different; I went to Rainbow Blossom, she was sitting out front on the curb, I walked by her, she asked me if I had any money, I said no I’m sorry, I went in got my things, got back in my car.  Then I just sat there for a minute.  Who the fuck knows what this person is dealing with?  Why does our society teach us to ignore people in need?  WWJD.  I thought, I can get her some food.

So after a couple minutes I got out of my car and walked toward her.  I wondered if she would remember that had already asked me.  She didn’t remember, and she asked me again.  This time I said, “I don’t have any money, but I could get you some food. Do you want some food?” And she said, “No, I only need money.” And she made a gesture with her hands like “if you don’t have money, just forget it.”

I asked her if she needed any other kind of help.  She made the hand gesture again, frustrated at the question.  So I walked away and I always wonder how people land in these situations.  Was it the consequences of poor life choices; was it circumstance; was it shit luck; was it some combination.

I wonder what percentage of people in this situation only need some kind of brain health medication:

– An SSRI

– An antidepressant

– An antipsychotic

Maybe they’re depressed, maybe they’re schizophrenic, maybe they have who knows what.  That a pill could turn their life around, but they don’t have access to healthcare is a tragedy and an indictment of our civilization.  Maybe they are running some awful narrative that was programmed into them years ago by shitty parents and is now reinforced by society.

It just seems so fixable to me, and that makes the tragedy worse.  But there’s no one trying to fix it for these individuals.  If you don’t have a support system, and you can’t claw your way out with your own two hands, you’re fucked.  Like, is that Darwinian?  Is that the way it should be?

We care for people who are physically unable to care for themselves because it’s obvious, and we are compassionate beings.  But somehow when the disease is not obvious then we’re like, tough shit, it’s up to you.  That doesn’t make any sense.  Just because we can’t physically see the problem, then it doesn’t activate our compassion?

So there needs to be some intervening body or organization to fill that gap between those who need help but who do not have a support system, or are not able to help themselves for whatever reason.  That’s a gap in our society and we do fuck all for you if you fall into it. That is barbaric and unsophisticated.